7: Pets

Now i know that i am writing this due to my heart being stolen again on saturday by the cutest most loveliest basset hound in the world, so i am dedicating this blog entry to the one and only!

Martha Farquard- Riddell

So there is a whole host of reasons as to why the gays like having pets, pseudo children/companionship/fashion accessory?? but the secret cannot be hidden that we love our pussy's and bitches!

for more reasons than not just to have the opportunity to name them after our favourite diva's and other gayified characters, i know of gays pets named, "mamma cass" and "dolly" to name a couple! i personally want a dog called "wanker" just to have an excuse to shout it out in public!

you only have to see how much the rule of love me love my dog goes such a long way in gay world, pets are allowed to appear in your manhunt profile pic where as no-one else is allowed to!!!

so here is to our gay pets! and just to irk the catholics that think that we impart our gay agenda and assimilate all innocents we come into contact with! it maybe true because ive gotta say that pets do take on the characteristics of their owners!

So Pope Benedict hear this We are taking over the world and we are raising an army of Hamsters, Cats, Snakes, Rabbits, Dogs and even Turtles to fight you!

Protein Shakes

Now this post can very easily descend into another whole host of body fascism discussion, but i wouldn't want to anger any thingboxers by suggesting that most gay men enjoy going to a gym. which is mainly true! and as a result of all this gym hopping, bench spotting, lockeroom cruising. There is the always steady gym companion and im sadly not talking jock straps, i am of course talking all colours all flavor protein shakes.

so whats wrong with a little bit of halitosis and some serious trumping action! when you have the body of an adonis! and with constant muscled torso's advertising no wonder us gays love them all we need now is ben cohen in a got milk style advertising campaign.

i am also very much aware that protein shakes are not only saved to drinking in the gym they are also a happy alternative to most office hot caffinated beverages, as i recall on one hilarious interview i went to at gaytimes (i didnt get the job on account of "not being gay enough, clearly if id only packed my shaker and 2 scoops of progain) as i was walked through the office and passed the staff room, expecting jars of sugar and masses of coffee i was met by a line of various whey protein products all individualy named and placed in acending height order! (they may be big and muscly but you cant stop the gays doing a little feng shui)

so dont delay get yourself down to holland and barretts and stock up and just to give you added evidence just look at what protein shakes did to this school boy!!! (p.s he is now my new step dad)